RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL:DEREK ERETZ: ACTIVE LISTENING

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL:DEREK ERETZ: ACTIVE LISTENING

 

 

BLUFFTON  SUN MAY 3, 2011

Shalom and peace:

We will continue today with Judaism's Derek Eretz, how we are to behave towards one another.

"Hate the expression: "And what of it?" (i.e., even of the most unimportant things you should not express yourself this way). ''

Now this was written circa 2000 plus years ago. How often do we hear folks today respond to other's issues with ''Too much information,'' or ''So what,'' or ''Whatever''? In fact all of these expressions translate to ''I don't care,'' or ''I don't have time for you.''

We are advised in Derek Eretz that we should ''hate'' these expressions, because even what seems unimportant to us, may be quite important to another person.

 

In Hebrew the word for mute (elem) and violence (alimut) have the same root. When we do not give ear to our friends concerns, when we mute them, we lead them to frustration and potential violence. How many times have we heard of or witnessed suicides, or attempts of such, with notes written stating that no one would listen to the suicidal person.

 

It is interesting to note, that modern Jewish ethical authorities, using ancient Talmudic maxims, have ruled that it is not in the best of Jewish behavior to ignore emails or even deny someone's ''friending'' on a social network. Just as we are taught to greet every person with a smile and warm ''shalom,'' with social media and email replacing the daily meeting of people in the market or on the street, we must respond to emails and friendship requests positively. Now of course, if one then abuses us, there are ways to block them on these networks.

 

Active listening is an act of ahavath chesed, loving kindness. Telling someone ''And what of it?'' or ''Whatever?'' trivializes their concerns and separates them from us.

 

Active listening is a communication technique that requires the listener to understand, interpret, and evaluate what he hears. The ability to listen actively can improve personal relationships through reducing conflicts, strengthening cooperation, and fostering understanding.

When interacting, people often are not listening attentively. We may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what the other is going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements). Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, focusing attention on the speaker. Suspending our own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental activities are important to fully attend to the speaker.

Active listening is putting aside ''self'' and ''selfishness'' and paying close attention not only to the words another is saying, but to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

While it was Dr. Thomas Gordon (USA 1918 -2002) who popularized the term ''active listening,'' the ancient sages of Talmudic Judaism taught it and practiced it. We would not want to have ourselves muted by another when we need to speak. Active listening is another way of loving our fellows as ourselves.

Rabbi Arthur Segal is an international lecturer, author, and teacher. Visit him at www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org.   Follow him on FaceBook at 'Arthur L Segal', on Twitter at RabbiASegal, or his blog at  http://rabbiarthursegal.blogspot.com .  Email at RabbiSegal@JewishSpiritualRenewal.net .

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL:JEWISH INTERFAITH WEDDINGS:BLUFFTON,SC; HILTON HEAD ISLAND,SC

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH INTERFAITH WEDDINGS: BLUFFTON,SC; HILTON HEAD ISLAND,SC

 

 

BLUFFTON,SC  SUN MAY 3, 2011

Shalom and peace:

We will continue today with Judaism's Derek Eretz, how we are to behave towards one another.

"Hate the expression: "And what of it?" (i.e., even of the most unimportant things you should not express yourself this way). ''

Now this was written circa 2000 plus years ago. How often do we hear folks today respond to other's issues with ''Too much information,'' or ''So what,'' or ''Whatever''? In fact all of these expressions translate to ''I don't care,'' or ''I don't have time for you.''

We are advised in Derek Eretz that we should ''hate'' these expressions, because even what seems unimportant to us, may be quite important to another person.

 

In Hebrew the word for mute (elem) and violence (alimut) have the same root. When we do not give ear to our friends concerns, when we mute them, we lead them to frustration and potential violence. How many times have we heard of or witnessed suicides, or attempts of such, with notes written stating that no one would listen to the suicidal person.

 

It is interesting to note, that modern Jewish ethical authorities, using ancient Talmudic maxims, have ruled that it is not in the best of Jewish behavior to ignore emails or even deny someone's ''friending'' on a social network. Just as we are taught to greet every person with a smile and warm ''shalom,'' with social media and email replacing the daily meeting of people in the market or on the street, we must respond to emails and friendship requests positively. Now of course, if one then abuses us, there are ways to block them on these networks.

 

Active listening is an act of ahavath chesed, loving kindness. Telling someone ''And what of it?'' or ''Whatever?'' trivializes their concerns and separates them from us.

 

Active listening is a communication technique that requires the listener to understand, interpret, and evaluate what he hears. The ability to listen actively can improve personal relationships through reducing conflicts, strengthening cooperation, and fostering understanding.

When interacting, people often are not listening attentively. We may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what the other is going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements). Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, focusing attention on the speaker. Suspending our own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental activities are important to fully attend to the speaker.

Active listening is putting aside ''self'' and ''selfishness'' and paying close attention not only to the words another is saying, but to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

While it was Dr. Thomas Gordon (USA 1918 -2002) who popularized the term ''active listening,'' the ancient sages of Talmudic Judaism taught it and practiced it. We would not want to have ourselves muted by another when we need to speak. Active listening is another way of loving our fellows as ourselves.

Rabbi Arthur Segal is an international lecturer, author, and teacher. Visit him at www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org.   Follow him on FaceBook at 'Arthur L Segal', on Twitter at RabbiASegal, or his blog at  http://rabbiarthursegal.blogspot.com .  Email at RabbiSegal@JewishSpiritualRenewal.net .

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

 

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH RENEWAL: DEREK ERETZ: FRIENDING ON FACEBOOK

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH RENEWAL: DEREK ERETZ: FRIENDING ON FACEBOOK

 

BLUFFTON SUN MAY 3, 2011

Shalom and peace:

We will continue today with Judaism's Derek Eretz, how we are to behave towards one another.

"Hate the expression: "And what of it?" (i.e., even of the most unimportant things you should not express yourself this way). ''

Now this was written circa 2000 plus years ago. How often do we hear folks today respond to other's issues with ''Too much information,'' or ''So what,'' or ''Whatever''? In fact all of these expressions translate to ''I don't care,'' or ''I don't have time for you.''

We are advised in Derek Eretz that we should ''hate'' these expressions, because even what seems unimportant to us, may be quite important to another person.

 

In Hebrew the word for mute (elem) and violence (alimut) have the same root. When we do not give ear to our friends concerns, when we mute them, we lead them to frustration and potential violence. How many times have we heard of or witnessed suicides, or attempts of such, with notes written stating that no one would listen to the suicidal person.

 

It is interesting to note, that modern Jewish ethical authorities, using ancient Talmudic maxims, have ruled that it is not in the best of Jewish behavior to ignore emails or even deny someone's ''friending'' on a social network. Just as we are taught to greet every person with a smile and warm ''shalom,'' with social media and email replacing the daily meeting of people in the market or on the street, we must respond to emails and friendship requests positively. Now of course, if one then abuses us, there are ways to block them on these networks.

 

Active listening is an act of ahavath chesed, loving kindness. Telling someone ''And what of it?'' or ''Whatever?'' trivializes their concerns and separates them from us.

 

Active listening is a communication technique that requires the listener to understand, interpret, and evaluate what he hears. The ability to listen actively can improve personal relationships through reducing conflicts, strengthening cooperation, and fostering understanding.

When interacting, people often are not listening attentively. We may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what the other is going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements). Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, focusing attention on the speaker. Suspending our own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental activities are important to fully attend to the speaker.

Active listening is putting aside ''self'' and ''selfishness'' and paying close attention not only to the words another is saying, but to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

While it was Dr. Thomas Gordon (USA 1918 -2002) who popularized the term ''active listening,'' the ancient sages of Talmudic Judaism taught it and practiced it. We would not want to have ourselves muted by another when we need to speak. Active listening is another way of loving our fellows as ourselves.

Rabbi Arthur Segal is an international lecturer, author, and teacher. Visit him at www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org.   Follow him on FaceBook at 'Arthur L Segal', on Twitter at RabbiASegal, or his blog at  http://rabbiarthursegal.blogspot.com .  Email at RabbiSegal@JewishSpiritualRenewal.net .

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

 

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUALITY: DEREK ERETZ: FRIENDING ON FACEBOOK

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUALITY: DEREK ERETZ: FRIENDING ON FACEBOOK

 

BLUFFTON SUN MAY 3, 2011

Shalom and peace:

We will continue today with Judaism's Derek Eretz, how we are to behave towards one another.

"Hate the expression: "And what of it?" (i.e., even of the most unimportant things you should not express yourself this way). ''

Now this was written circa 2000 plus years ago. How often do we hear folks today respond to other's issues with ''Too much information,'' or ''So what,'' or ''Whatever''? In fact all of these expressions translate to ''I don't care,'' or ''I don't have time for you.''

We are advised in Derek Eretz that we should ''hate'' these expressions, because even what seems unimportant to us, may be quite important to another person.

 

In Hebrew the word for mute (elem) and violence (alimut) have the same root. When we do not give ear to our friends concerns, when we mute them, we lead them to frustration and potential violence. How many times have we heard of or witnessed suicides, or attempts of such, with notes written stating that no one would listen to the suicidal person.

 

It is interesting to note, that modern Jewish ethical authorities, using ancient Talmudic maxims, have ruled that it is not in the best of Jewish behavior to ignore emails or even deny someone's ''friending'' on a social network. Just as we are taught to greet every person with a smile and warm ''shalom,'' with social media and email replacing the daily meeting of people in the market or on the street, we must respond to emails and friendship requests positively. Now of course, if one then abuses us, there are ways to block them on these networks.

 

Active listening is an act of ahavath chesed, loving kindness. Telling someone ''And what of it?'' or ''Whatever?'' trivializes their concerns and separates them from us.

 

Active listening is a communication technique that requires the listener to understand, interpret, and evaluate what he hears. The ability to listen actively can improve personal relationships through reducing conflicts, strengthening cooperation, and fostering understanding.

When interacting, people often are not listening attentively. We may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what the other is going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements). Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, focusing attention on the speaker. Suspending our own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental activities are important to fully attend to the speaker.

Active listening is putting aside ''self'' and ''selfishness'' and paying close attention not only to the words another is saying, but to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

While it was Dr. Thomas Gordon (USA 1918 -2002) who popularized the term ''active listening,'' the ancient sages of Talmudic Judaism taught it and practiced it. We would not want to have ourselves muted by another when we need to speak. Active listening is another way of loving our fellows as ourselves.

Rabbi Arthur Segal is an international lecturer, author, and teacher. Visit him at www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org.   Follow him on FaceBook at 'Arthur L Segal', on Twitter at RabbiASegal, or his blog at  http://rabbiarthursegal.blogspot.com .  Email at RabbiSegal@JewishSpiritualRenewal.net .

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

 

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: ECO-JUDAISM: DEREK ERETZ: FRIENDING ON FACEBOOK

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: ECO-JUDAISM: DEREK ERETZ: FRIENDING ON FACEBOOK

 

BLUFFTON  SUN MAY 3, 2011

Shalom and peace:

We will continue today with Judaism's Derek Eretz, how we are to behave towards one another.

"Hate the expression: "And what of it?" (i.e., even of the most unimportant things you should not express yourself this way). ''

Now this was written circa 2000 plus years ago. How often do we hear folks today respond to other's issues with ''Too much information,'' or ''So what,'' or ''Whatever''? In fact all of these expressions translate to ''I don't care,'' or ''I don't have time for you.''

We are advised in Derek Eretz that we should ''hate'' these expressions, because even what seems unimportant to us, may be quite important to another person.

 

In Hebrew the word for mute (elem) and violence (alimut) have the same root. When we do not give ear to our friends concerns, when we mute them, we lead them to frustration and potential violence. How many times have we heard of or witnessed suicides, or attempts of such, with notes written stating that no one would listen to the suicidal person.

 

It is interesting to note, that modern Jewish ethical authorities, using ancient Talmudic maxims, have ruled that it is not in the best of Jewish behavior to ignore emails or even deny someone's ''friending'' on a social network. Just as we are taught to greet every person with a smile and warm ''shalom,'' with social media and email replacing the daily meeting of people in the market or on the street, we must respond to emails and friendship requests positively. Now of course, if one then abuses us, there are ways to block them on these networks.

 

Active listening is an act of ahavath chesed, loving kindness. Telling someone ''And what of it?'' or ''Whatever?'' trivializes their concerns and separates them from us.

 

Active listening is a communication technique that requires the listener to understand, interpret, and evaluate what he hears. The ability to listen actively can improve personal relationships through reducing conflicts, strengthening cooperation, and fostering understanding.

When interacting, people often are not listening attentively. We may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what the other is going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements). Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, focusing attention on the speaker. Suspending our own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental activities are important to fully attend to the speaker.

Active listening is putting aside ''self'' and ''selfishness'' and paying close attention not only to the words another is saying, but to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

While it was Dr. Thomas Gordon (USA 1918 -2002) who popularized the term ''active listening,'' the ancient sages of Talmudic Judaism taught it and practiced it. We would not want to have ourselves muted by another when we need to speak. Active listening is another way of loving our fellows as ourselves.

Rabbi Arthur Segal is an international lecturer, author, and teacher. Visit him at www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org.   Follow him on FaceBook at 'Arthur L Segal', on Twitter at RabbiASegal, or his blog at  http://rabbiarthursegal.blogspot.com .  Email at RabbiSegal@JewishSpiritualRenewal.net .

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

 

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: ECO-JUDAISM: DEREK ERETZ: ACTIVE LISTENING

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: ECO-JUDAISM: DEREK ERETZ: ACTIVE LISTENING

 

BLUFFTON  SUN MAY 3, 2011

Shalom and peace:

We will continue today with Judaism's Derek Eretz, how we are to behave towards one another.

"Hate the expression: "And what of it?" (i.e., even of the most unimportant things you should not express yourself this way). ''

Now this was written circa 2000 plus years ago. How often do we hear folks today respond to other's issues with ''Too much information,'' or ''So what,'' or ''Whatever''? In fact all of these expressions translate to ''I don't care,'' or ''I don't have time for you.''

We are advised in Derek Eretz that we should ''hate'' these expressions, because even what seems unimportant to us, may be quite important to another person.

 

In Hebrew the word for mute (elem) and violence (alimut) have the same root. When we do not give ear to our friends concerns, when we mute them, we lead them to frustration and potential violence. How many times have we heard of or witnessed suicides, or attempts of such, with notes written stating that no one would listen to the suicidal person.

 

It is interesting to note, that modern Jewish ethical authorities, using ancient Talmudic maxims, have ruled that it is not in the best of Jewish behavior to ignore emails or even deny someone's ''friending'' on a social network. Just as we are taught to greet every person with a smile and warm ''shalom,'' with social media and email replacing the daily meeting of people in the market or on the street, we must respond to emails and friendship requests positively. Now of course, if one then abuses us, there are ways to block them on these networks.

 

Active listening is an act of ahavath chesed, loving kindness. Telling someone ''And what of it?'' or ''Whatever?'' trivializes their concerns and separates them from us.

 

Active listening is a communication technique that requires the listener to understand, interpret, and evaluate what he hears. The ability to listen actively can improve personal relationships through reducing conflicts, strengthening cooperation, and fostering understanding.

When interacting, people often are not listening attentively. We may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what the other is going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements). Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, focusing attention on the speaker. Suspending our own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental activities are important to fully attend to the speaker.

Active listening is putting aside ''self'' and ''selfishness'' and paying close attention not only to the words another is saying, but to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

While it was Dr. Thomas Gordon (USA 1918 -2002) who popularized the term ''active listening,'' the ancient sages of Talmudic Judaism taught it and practiced it. We would not want to have ourselves muted by another when we need to speak. Active listening is another way of loving our fellows as ourselves.

Rabbi Arthur Segal is an international lecturer, author, and teacher. Visit him at www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org.   Follow him on FaceBook at 'Arthur L Segal', on Twitter at RabbiASegal, or his blog at  http://rabbiarthursegal.blogspot.com .  Email at RabbiSegal@JewishSpiritualRenewal.net .

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

 

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUALITY: DEREK ERETZ: ACTIVE LISTENING

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUALITY: DEREK ERETZ: ACTIVE LISTENING

 

BLUFFTON  SUN MAY 3, 2011

Shalom and peace:

We will continue today with Judaism's Derek Eretz, how we are to behave towards one another.

"Hate the expression: "And what of it?" (i.e., even of the most unimportant things you should not express yourself this way). ''

Now this was written circa 2000 plus years ago. How often do we hear folks today respond to other's issues with ''Too much information,'' or ''So what,'' or ''Whatever''? In fact all of these expressions translate to ''I don't care,'' or ''I don't have time for you.''

We are advised in Derek Eretz that we should ''hate'' these expressions, because even what seems unimportant to us, may be quite important to another person.

 

In Hebrew the word for mute (elem) and violence (alimut) have the same root. When we do not give ear to our friends concerns, when we mute them, we lead them to frustration and potential violence. How many times have we heard of or witnessed suicides, or attempts of such, with notes written stating that no one would listen to the suicidal person.

 

It is interesting to note, that modern Jewish ethical authorities, using ancient Talmudic maxims, have ruled that it is not in the best of Jewish behavior to ignore emails or even deny someone's ''friending'' on a social network. Just as we are taught to greet every person with a smile and warm ''shalom,'' with social media and email replacing the daily meeting of people in the market or on the street, we must respond to emails and friendship requests positively. Now of course, if one then abuses us, there are ways to block them on these networks.

 

Active listening is an act of ahavath chesed, loving kindness. Telling someone ''And what of it?'' or ''Whatever?'' trivializes their concerns and separates them from us.

 

Active listening is a communication technique that requires the listener to understand, interpret, and evaluate what he hears. The ability to listen actively can improve personal relationships through reducing conflicts, strengthening cooperation, and fostering understanding.

When interacting, people often are not listening attentively. We may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what the other is going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements). Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, focusing attention on the speaker. Suspending our own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental activities are important to fully attend to the speaker.

Active listening is putting aside ''self'' and ''selfishness'' and paying close attention not only to the words another is saying, but to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

While it was Dr. Thomas Gordon (USA 1918 -2002) who popularized the term ''active listening,'' the ancient sages of Talmudic Judaism taught it and practiced it. We would not want to have ourselves muted by another when we need to speak. Active listening is another way of loving our fellows as ourselves.

Rabbi Arthur Segal is an international lecturer, author, and teacher. Visit him at www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org.   Follow him on FaceBook at 'Arthur L Segal', on Twitter at RabbiASegal, or his blog at  http://rabbiarthursegal.blogspot.com .  Email at RabbiSegal@JewishSpiritualRenewal.net .

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

 

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH RENEWAL: DEREK ERETZ: ACTIVE LISTENING

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH   RENEWAL: DEREK ERETZ: ACTIVE LISTENING

 

BLUFFTON  SUN MAY 3, 2011

Shalom and peace:

We will continue today with Judaism's Derek Eretz, how we are to behave towards one another.

"Hate the expression: "And what of it?" (i.e., even of the most unimportant things you should not express yourself this way). ''

Now this was written circa 2000 plus years ago. How often do we hear folks today respond to other's issues with ''Too much information,'' or ''So what,'' or ''Whatever''? In fact all of these expressions translate to ''I don't care,'' or ''I don't have time for you.''

We are advised in Derek Eretz that we should ''hate'' these expressions, because even what seems unimportant to us, may be quite important to another person.

 

In Hebrew the word for mute (elem) and violence (alimut) have the same root. When we do not give ear to our friends concerns, when we mute them, we lead them to frustration and potential violence. How many times have we heard of or witnessed suicides, or attempts of such, with notes written stating that no one would listen to the suicidal person.

 

It is interesting to note, that modern Jewish ethical authorities, using ancient Talmudic maxims, have ruled that it is not in the best of Jewish behavior to ignore emails or even deny someone's ''friending'' on a social network. Just as we are taught to greet every person with a smile and warm ''shalom,'' with social media and email replacing the daily meeting of people in the market or on the street, we must respond to emails and friendship requests positively. Now of course, if one then abuses us, there are ways to block them on these networks.

 

Active listening is an act of ahavath chesed, loving kindness. Telling someone ''And what of it?'' or ''Whatever?'' trivializes their concerns and separates them from us.

 

Active listening is a communication technique that requires the listener to understand, interpret, and evaluate what he hears. The ability to listen actively can improve personal relationships through reducing conflicts, strengthening cooperation, and fostering understanding.

When interacting, people often are not listening attentively. We may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what the other is going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements). Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, focusing attention on the speaker. Suspending our own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental activities are important to fully attend to the speaker.

Active listening is putting aside ''self'' and ''selfishness'' and paying close attention not only to the words another is saying, but to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

While it was Dr. Thomas Gordon (USA 1918 -2002) who popularized the term ''active listening,'' the ancient sages of Talmudic Judaism taught it and practiced it. We would not want to have ourselves muted by another when we need to speak. Active listening is another way of loving our fellows as ourselves.

Rabbi Arthur Segal is an international lecturer, author, and teacher. Visit him at www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org.   Follow him on FaceBook at 'Arthur L Segal', on Twitter at RabbiASegal, or his blog at  http://rabbiarthursegal.blogspot.com .  Email at RabbiSegal@JewishSpiritualRenewal.net .

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

 

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL: COKE ON YOUR SEDER PLATE?

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL: COKE ON YOUR SEDER PLATE?

 

A Passover Toast to a Rabbi Known for Social Activism, and for Kosher Coca-Cola

By SAMUEL G. FREEDMAN

Published: April 22, 2011  NEW YORK TIMES

 

Rabbi Tuvia Geffen, of blessed memory, was born in Lithuania in 1870 and educated in the renowned Slobodka yeshiva. In the wake of a pogrom, he immigrated to New York in 1903, and seven years later he moved to Atlanta to become the rabbi of Shearith Israel, a tiny and struggling Orthodox congregation meeting in the battered remnant of a Methodist church.

Tuvia Geffen

During his early decades at Shearith Israel, Rabbi Geffen established Atlanta's first Hebrew school and oversaw its ritual bath. He stood by Leo Frank, the Jewish man falsely accused of murdering a young Christian girl, and after Frank's lynching in 1915, the rabbi urged his congregants not to flee the South in fear.

At Passover in 1925, he spoke eloquently and presciently against Congress for passing immigration restrictions that "have slammed shut the gates of the country before the wanderers, the strangers, and those who walk in darkness from place to place." As early as 1933, he warned about the Nazi regime in Germany. Long before feminism, he advocated for Orthodox women who were being denied religious divorce decrees by vindictive husbands.

But all those achievements are not why we invoke the name and memory of Rabbi Geffen  today, more than 40 years after his death. No, we come to honor his least likely yet most enduring contribution to the Jewish people and his adopted nation: kosher-for-Passover Coca-Cola.

Yes, observant Jews of today, searching supermarket counters for those bottles with the telltale yellow cap bearing the Orthodox Union's certification, and yes, Coke die-hards of any or no religion who seek out those same bottles for the throwback flavor of cane-sugar Coke, you owe it all to Rabbi Tuvia  Geffen.

He of the long beard and wire-rim glasses and Yiddish-inflected English, a man by all outward appearances belonging to the Old World, he was the person who by geographical coincidence and unexpected perspicacity adapted Coca-Cola's secret formula to make the iconic soft drink kosher in one version for Passover and in another for the rest of the year. To this day, his 1935 rabbinical ruling, known in Hebrew as a teshuva, remains the standard.

That ruling, in turn, did much more than solve a dietary problem. A generation after Frank's lynching, a decade after Congress barred the Golden Door, amid the early stages of Hitler's genocide, kosher Coke formed a powerful symbol of American Jewry's place in the mainstream.

"Rabbi Geffen really got the importance of it," said Marcie Cohen Ferris, a professor of American studies at the University of North Carolina, who specializes in Jewish life in the South. "You couldn't live in any better place than the South to get it. To not drink Coca-Cola was certainly to be considered un-American."

Or look at the interplay of Jews and America from another angle. Rabbi Geffen's solution to the Coke problem was not to forget the kosher rules and melt into the melting pot. But neither was it to decry the spiritual pollution of modernity in the form of a fizzy drink. A half-century before the era of cultural pluralism, his answer was to have the majority address the distinct needs of a minority.

As a contemporary Orthodox rabbi, Adam Mintz , has written in an essay on Geffen  and Coke: "Struggling to find their place in a land that was often hostile to their religion, American Jews respected and appreciated rabbis who sought to include them within the Orthodox camp rather than simply condemn them as sinners. Of course his approach would not have been possible had he not felt confident in his powers of persuasion."

We can safely say, however, that this issue chose Rabbi Geffen  rather than the other way around. As early as 1925, as the Orthodox authority in Coke's home city, he was receiving inquiries from other rabbis about the drink's kosher status. A few other rabbis had already given certification, without knowing the secret formula. And multitudes of American Jews were drinking Coke regardless.

"Because it has become an insurmountable problem to induce the great majority of Jews to refrain from partaking of this drink," Rabbi Geffen  wrote in his teshuva  , "I have tried earnestly to find a method of permitting its usage. With the help of God, I have been able to uncover a pragmatic solution."

Putting aside God's props for a moment, we should note that Rabbi Geffen  had some significant earthly help in the person of Harold Hirsch, a Jewish Atlantan who was Coca-Cola's corporate lawyer. Through Hirsch, Rabbi Geffen  was permitted to enter that industry's Holy of Holies and receive Coke's secret formula.

With it, the rabbi was able to identify the elements that rendered Coke non-kosher   during the bulk of the year (oil of glycerine derived from beef tallow) and specifically during Passover (a corn derivative). Hiding the exact ingredients behind Hebrew euphemisms in his teshuva , Rabbi Geffen  explained the needed corrections. Glycerine could be replaced by coconut or cottonseed oils, and the corn derivative by cane or beet sugars.

Kosher-for-Passover Coke is now produced under rabbinic supervision at bottling plants serving Jewish population centers in New York, Florida, Southern California and Houston, among other areas. A number of other major brands have followed Coke into the Passover market: Dannon, Lipton, Pepsi and Tropicana. There are tequila and blintzes made without forbidden grains.

"It used to be that for Pesach you were limited to matzah and hard-boiled eggs," said Rabbi Menachem Genack, the head of the Orthodox Union's kosher-certification program. "Now, I've got to tell you, I love those cheese blintzes."

And, whether devout or debauched, Coke fans anticipate Passover for their own cultish reason: the usual sweetener, high-fructose corn syrup, is replaced by cane or beet sugar.

Moshe Feder , an editor of science-fiction and fantasy books, traveled to six supermarkets from his home in Queens before finding four two-liter bottles of Passover Coke. The subject of his quest happened to come up at a seder the other night. The host, a Jewish man, had never heard about the difference between Coke and Passover Coke. But two Roman Catholic guests, Mr. Feder   reported, "knew all about it."

Rabbi Geffen , of blessed memory, who'd  have guessed you were so ecumenical?

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL:REBBE MADE COKE KOSHER FOR PASSOVER

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL:THE REBBE WHO MADE COKE KOSHER FOR PASSOVER

 

A Passover Toast to a Rabbi Known for Social Activism, and for Kosher Coca-Cola

By SAMUEL G. FREEDMAN

Published: April 22, 2011  NEW YORK TIMES

 

Rabbi Tuvia Geffen, of blessed memory, was born in Lithuania in 1870 and educated in the renowned Slobodka yeshiva. In the wake of a pogrom, he immigrated to New York in 1903, and seven years later he moved to Atlanta to become the rabbi of Shearith Israel, a tiny and struggling Orthodox congregation meeting in the battered remnant of a Methodist church.

Tuvia Geffen

During his early decades at Shearith Israel, Rabbi Geffen established Atlanta's first Hebrew school and oversaw its ritual bath. He stood by Leo Frank, the Jewish man falsely accused of murdering a young Christian girl, and after Frank's lynching in 1915, the rabbi urged his congregants not to flee the South in fear.

At Passover in 1925, he spoke eloquently and presciently against Congress for passing immigration restrictions that "have slammed shut the gates of the country before the wanderers, the strangers, and those who walk in darkness from place to place." As early as 1933, he warned about the Nazi regime in Germany. Long before feminism, he advocated for Orthodox women who were being denied religious divorce decrees by vindictive husbands.

But all those achievements are not why we invoke the name and memory of Rabbi Geffen  today, more than 40 years after his death. No, we come to honor his least likely yet most enduring contribution to the Jewish people and his adopted nation: kosher-for-Passover Coca-Cola.

Yes, observant Jews of today, searching supermarket counters for those bottles with the telltale yellow cap bearing the Orthodox Union's certification, and yes, Coke die-hards of any or no religion who seek out those same bottles for the throwback flavor of cane-sugar Coke, you owe it all to Rabbi Tuvia  Geffen.

He of the long beard and wire-rim glasses and Yiddish-inflected English, a man by all outward appearances belonging to the Old World, he was the person who by geographical coincidence and unexpected perspicacity adapted Coca-Cola's secret formula to make the iconic soft drink kosher in one version for Passover and in another for the rest of the year. To this day, his 1935 rabbinical ruling, known in Hebrew as a teshuva, remains the standard.

That ruling, in turn, did much more than solve a dietary problem. A generation after Frank's lynching, a decade after Congress barred the Golden Door, amid the early stages of Hitler's genocide, kosher Coke formed a powerful symbol of American Jewry's place in the mainstream.

"Rabbi Geffen really got the importance of it," said Marcie Cohen Ferris, a professor of American studies at the University of North Carolina, who specializes in Jewish life in the South. "You couldn't live in any better place than the South to get it. To not drink Coca-Cola was certainly to be considered un-American."

Or look at the interplay of Jews and America from another angle. Rabbi Geffen's solution to the Coke problem was not to forget the kosher rules and melt into the melting pot. But neither was it to decry the spiritual pollution of modernity in the form of a fizzy drink. A half-century before the era of cultural pluralism, his answer was to have the majority address the distinct needs of a minority.

As a contemporary Orthodox rabbi, Adam Mintz , has written in an essay on Geffen  and Coke: "Struggling to find their place in a land that was often hostile to their religion, American Jews respected and appreciated rabbis who sought to include them within the Orthodox camp rather than simply condemn them as sinners. Of course his approach would not have been possible had he not felt confident in his powers of persuasion."

We can safely say, however, that this issue chose Rabbi Geffen  rather than the other way around. As early as 1925, as the Orthodox authority in Coke's home city, he was receiving inquiries from other rabbis about the drink's kosher status. A few other rabbis had already given certification, without knowing the secret formula. And multitudes of American Jews were drinking Coke regardless.

"Because it has become an insurmountable problem to induce the great majority of Jews to refrain from partaking of this drink," Rabbi Geffen  wrote in his teshuva  , "I have tried earnestly to find a method of permitting its usage. With the help of God, I have been able to uncover a pragmatic solution."

Putting aside God's props for a moment, we should note that Rabbi Geffen  had some significant earthly help in the person of Harold Hirsch, a Jewish Atlantan who was Coca-Cola's corporate lawyer. Through Hirsch, Rabbi Geffen  was permitted to enter that industry's Holy of Holies and receive Coke's secret formula.

With it, the rabbi was able to identify the elements that rendered Coke non-kosher   during the bulk of the year (oil of glycerine derived from beef tallow) and specifically during Passover (a corn derivative). Hiding the exact ingredients behind Hebrew euphemisms in his teshuva , Rabbi Geffen  explained the needed corrections. Glycerine could be replaced by coconut or cottonseed oils, and the corn derivative by cane or beet sugars.

Kosher-for-Passover Coke is now produced under rabbinic supervision at bottling plants serving Jewish population centers in New York, Florida, Southern California and Houston, among other areas. A number of other major brands have followed Coke into the Passover market: Dannon, Lipton, Pepsi and Tropicana. There are tequila and blintzes made without forbidden grains.

"It used to be that for Pesach you were limited to matzah and hard-boiled eggs," said Rabbi Menachem Genack, the head of the Orthodox Union's kosher-certification program. "Now, I've got to tell you, I love those cheese blintzes."

And, whether devout or debauched, Coke fans anticipate Passover for their own cultish reason: the usual sweetener, high-fructose corn syrup, is replaced by cane or beet sugar.

Moshe Feder , an editor of science-fiction and fantasy books, traveled to six supermarkets from his home in Queens before finding four two-liter bottles of Passover Coke. The subject of his quest happened to come up at a seder the other night. The host, a Jewish man, had never heard about the difference between Coke and Passover Coke. But two Roman Catholic guests, Mr. Feder   reported, "knew all about it."

Rabbi Geffen , of blessed memory, who'd  have guessed you were so ecumenical?

Rabbi Arthur Segal www.jewishspiritualrenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal www.jewishrenewal.info
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA